Ryan

My name is Ryan. I am a 25 year old male from Kentucky. My mother died when I was 14 and my father was a wealthy unloving father who raised me harshly. I got into the drug game early ( heroine addict) and became a hit man with 20-30 heads under my belt for a big drug dealer. I gave it all up for christianity but after someone at my church spoke down to my bisexual sister about her sexuality I gave up religion and went back to school for business.

When my mother passed away I started to chat with Nicole online. What my father lacked in warmth and comfort, she was able to fill in. After a few months we shifted to aim and then telephone conversations. Now after 5-7 years of communication, a few visits from my sister Shayla in place of me, and no physical meetings from myself Nicole is fed up and wishes to meet me or else communication will cease as she has confessed her love for me and "must" see me.

Unfortunately I am a woman and Ryan is merely a character I have created for various reasons. Nicole helped me through my struggles in life as my family has encountered detrimental turmoil. I am faced with quite a dilemma as my online friend is tired of waiting to finally meet me and threatening to end communications so I must find a Ryan in real life. Someone who can fit the role of reformed bad boy, educated, and handsome. I will post an ad on craigslist and find this man.

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As I was scanning through the craigslist ads as I do every hour or so throughout my day I came across a post seeking a handsome young male actor. I clicked the link and read a post with very general details which instructed those who fit the criteria listed on the page to inquire via email for further information. Instinctively I emailed immediately and gave a brief introductory statement of myself and included my model mayhem (model portfolio website) web address for the poster of the ad to see what I looked like.

Shortly after I had sent the message my phone vibrated and I was notified of a new message. Whenever my phone vibrates it could be 5 things; low battery, a phone call, an alarm, a new text, or a new email. The cause of this buzzing was the aftermath of my catching "Ryans" creators attention with my email. After numerous detailed emails back and forth I was briefed on the assignment, whom I would be acting as, and what I would be required to do. Needless to say I accepted the offer and we went into stage two of planning a date and time.

Two weeks later on Friday September, 17th I woke up and made a very tasty broccoli mozzarella and parmesean cheese omelet and washed it down with a few strawberries. I went to the gym where I ellipticalled my way to a heart rate of 175 for ten minutes and then proceeded to work out for 2 more hours. Afterwards I ordered a spinach salad with avacados, broccoli, black beans, croutons, corn, tomatoes, carrots, steamed spinach, cauliflower, cucumbers, and a balsamic vinaigrette then headed for the subway. In the 6 or so stops it took to get from Wall street to Grand central I had consumed my monster salad (was a good way to keep my thoughts from roaming into potential negative outcome scenarios for the immediate future). I departed the subway and made my way for the train ticket acquisition area. My ticket was purchased and I was on my way North to meet the mastermind behind "Ryan".

I made it to White Plains, NY earlier than anticipated and decided to call my father. I always inform him of my wild endeavors so I figured why not continue the tradition and fill him in on this one. His uneasy tone was easily translated into concern and disapproval. He simply asked me to put myself in the shoes of the woman whom Ryan is in love with. "You're fucking with her and the woman who created this character is an asshole". He continued to say that what I was doing is fraud and it just doesn't have a good vibe. I told him that I loved him and sincerely appreciated his concern but that I was to carry through with my unprecedented task at hand.

We hung up and I sat on the bench waiting for my new boss to arrive, contemplating. I had to stay optimistic and confident or else my performance would be with distraction and perhaps my cover would be blown. I tried to think of how this chick who created the male figure could use me to acquire some financial benefit from the woman online and as I was unsuccessfully brainstorming I received another discouraging text from my father.

With a message similar to what he had said on the phone, my father made his final plea for me to abort mission. I replied back explaining that both these women found comfort from the other and that I was merely a catalyst to their depressing (to a third party) relief from the real world.I continued by saying, "its like people who believe in and get comfort from god. A priest provides them with the story and makes everything flow. I'm just like a fucked up (actor) priest." His response was short, "I love you".

Ryans sisters name is Shayla so we will call my boss Shayla. She pulls up in a late model 5 series (bmw) and parks the car in an adjacent garage to the station. When she emerged from the concrete structure her dirty blond hair and short curvy figure matched with a cautious yet glowing face allowed my worries of this all being a staged production to have me arrested or murdered from persons in my past had disappeared. We awkwardly said hello and spent a good 5 minutes trying to find her car that she had just parked a second ago: clear sign she was nervous or a true blond.

As we searched the interrogative dialogue began and I asked her straight off the bat what her benefit and goal for the day was. I could tell she was an intelligent girl because she kept things vague until I would press harder and even then, I'm sure I truly only know half of the actual story's details. We found the car, a navy blue 1995 5 series with new emblems and a worn leather interior; certainly a car to be comfortable in. What was most obvious that this creative girl was who she said she was was the Kentucky license plate. We got in the car and started our journey to Connecticut.

After all the necessary questions were asked from my end and Shayla filled me in on everything that I needed to know we began to chat as if we had been friends for a while. We spoke about current events from our lives, listened to music, and laughed. It was oddly comfortable. I'm not sure whether I was genuinely enjoying her company or subconsciously trying to distract myself from the blatant reality that I was soon going to be acting as if I were in love with a random unattractive woman I knew nothing about as well as play the role of Shaylas brother. Either way, I enjoyed the ride.

We exited the highway and Shayla told me that we were going to get Nicole flowers. She said if we can keep her awe struck that you're actually here, her knight in shining armor, then she will not inquire on any of the details discussed between each other over the many years of chatting I would have been responsible for knowing. Thus the flowers, my gentlemanly ways, and my handsome features. Clearly this girl had contemplated this over and over to assure no room for failure highlighting her love for this woman named Nicole.

Shayla was not the best driver despite her telling me of her love for speed. After she nearly killed us three times with potential accidents, she figured shed see how I drove. It made sense since this was Ryans car and Nicole may find it odd that his sister was driving him around. But let's face it, this whole fucking thing is pretty odd so I'm sure it wouldn't have phased Nicole.

I get in the car, adjust my mirrors, and take a deep breath. I was about to drive to meet a person who was madly in love with me, give her flowers, and pretend that I; knew her, loved her, and was actually attracted to the short ugly and fat person that she was. This is certainly not the craziest thing I had ever done but it ranked among the top ten. I pulled out of the flower shops parking lot and a minute later I was face to face with Nicole.

In Shaylas informative lecture as to whom Ryan was on our ride to this point, I asked her of any pet names I should call her. "Princess" was what I was to call Nicole so when I first saw her I gave her the flowers and said "hello princess its so good to finally see you". We were to go to a movie at 5:45 and it was just about 5 when the rendezvous occurred so I killed some time driving around. We drove past a few stores and decided to go look at shoes and puppies. The shoes sucked and there were no puppies so we drove a bit more and then went to the movies. Shayla wanted to see "Devil" and it was so bad that we ended up walking out and going to dinner early.

Bertuccis. That was where Nicole wanted to go, her special place. Earlier on the ride out Shayla asked me what I meant when I had texted her that obviously Nicole does not need much to be impressed. I was referring to the dining establishment she had picked up. I explained my theory to Shayla and she told me that she couldn't disagree with where I was coming from. As we were entering this mediocre Italian restaurant Shayla told me to tell Nicole my theory on quality of Chain restaurants.

I gave her an example to help her grasp the concept I was attempting to unleash on these ladies. If you buy a pair of pants which were mass produced in China they would in no way resemble the same quality as a pair of hand made designer pants where time and precision was allotted freely to ensure the highest quality. I'm not saying you can't get a tasty meal at a chain restaurant but I am saying that chances are at least where I live, that if you go out to a non chain place to eat you're going to get some stellar dishes. Nicole awkwardly agreed as we entered the over rated bertuccis.

The hostess asked me how many and what name. I was getting comfortable with my character and ALMOST said that my name was Randall. "Ryan for 3 please". We were seated almost immediately and I sought refuge in the restroom for a few to catch up on my missed calls and unread messages. I returned to the table and Nicole went to the toilet. Shayla complimented and thanked me for my performance and asked if I had enough cash for dinner (which she supplied beforehand). I did not so we went out to the car to get some more cash.

We returned and the fat girl had her place set on the table with a vacant spot to her side. I took the hint that that was my sign to sit next to her so I slid in and tried not to look at her. The role I was playing was that of one who was picky with what he selected which to me was a bit of an oxymoron seeing how the aesthetic of Nicole was so horrid. I pretended to be overwhelmed with the menu and asked my Princess what she thought I should select. She said that I was so picky she had no idea. I wanted to get the steak and chicken combo as this wasn't my dime covering dinner but I stayed in character and opted for the lasagna.

Shayla got ravioli and Nicole a salad then a depressing conversation took place. I asked why Nicole had only eaten a small portion of her salad and she explained to me how she hadn't eaten in 3 days and how anything she ate was going to upset her stomach. When Shayla asked her why she would go and do a silly thing like not eat Nicoles response though simple, almost made me feel bad for doing what I was doing. She said she was trying to fit into the shirt that she was wearing. She knows she's fat and really tried to look good for the unreal character she's in love with. I almost felt bad. Fortunately she ordered some sangria and the thought of getting a little buzz erased any contemplations of how wrong this whole scenario was.

This created an immediate worry though. Ordering alcohol generally coincides with showing identification. I thought that if I took out my ID Nicole would ask to see my photo. As she ordered the caraff of alcohol I announced that I needed to go out to the car and as I was getting up the waitress asked if we wanted anything else to drink. I sat back down and thanked the waitress for her offer but declined then told Nicole that I didn't need to go outside anymore. Puzzled she gave me a questioning look and I immediately told her that I was going to put on some more make up but that I decided not to. The topic was dropped right there.

With Nicole being the only one content with her meal I hailed the waitress over. She asked how everything was and I pointed to Shaylas dish and told the waitress to "throw that away, wrap up my lasagna, and do whatever she (Nicole) wants with her dish). The waitress was shocked and asked if Shayla did not like her dish, in a careless tone my sister said that it was disgusting and I jumped in and said the only reason I want my lasagna to go is so I can feed my dogs as they will eat any shit I give them. This was all part of a sick game. Emphasizing that Nicole not only picked a shitty restaurant but that her two "dates" who drove 13 hours to see her were disgusted with their meals. Brutal!

We drove back to Nicoles car and I apologized for the let down of the movie and dinner. Nicole said it was fine and that it was amazing and special that I came to see her. I told her that I'd do everything I could to come back to see her asap and that it made me so happy to see her after all these years of waiting and that she was certainly worth the wait. I think at that moment I threw up in my mouth but that's besides the point. It was LOVE.

Shayla and I drove back to the train station and she kept telling me how happy she was and that I did great. Also, she offered that if I were interested in this situation again that she'd be happy to pay for my services. I'll have to think long and hard about the possibility of a next time. This Nicole girl is nothing I'd like to make regular in my life though living in NY is expensive and that shit just paid my rent!